Knitting and a Bottle

I think I am going to pull out the cabled riding jacket and get back to work on it today. Kyle is gone camping this weekend so I'll have some free time during Lowan's naps. Not that I don't have free time during the week during nap time, but I've been itching to get some knitting done. I need to finish one sleeve and knit the collar. Then I need to seam everything up.

Sad news on the Tilted Duster front. I finally gave up on being able to wear it and gave it to my sister when she was here a couple of weeks ago. It was a lot of work and a lot of money spent on yarn that I did not want to let go of, but she really liked it and it shrank down to her size. I was sad, but would rather someone where it then it sit in my drawer.

Lowan had his first bottle on Thursday night.



I was prepping him for his first baby-sitting experience with my mom last night. It didn't happen. I was supposed to go out with some friends for her birthday. They called at 10pm as they were heading out and I was to tired to go out so late. I'd sent my mom home at about 9:30. I like to get my night started by 8 so I can be home and in bed my 11pm. So sad. But this is not baby related, I've always been this way.

So I pumped for the first time on Thursday, fascinating stuff!! I was amazed at how this whole pumping thing works, I have a madela electric pump and the thing is efficient. I won't describe the whole pumping process, but it was pretty cool. Then Kyle gave Lowan a bottle Thursday night, we wanted to make sure he'd drink it while I was home as opposed to while I'm gone and he gets very upset at no food. He took it fine, drinking about 2.5 ounces.



Here is his face afterwards, pretty funny.

So anyways, he was never left alone last night. It is fine, I was really sad to have him drink from a bottle. Up to now, he had only been fed directly from and by me. I was happy for Kyle to get to bond with him in that way, but don't know if I was entirely ready for the change. So he probably won't get another bottle for awhile, but it is nice to be moving along that path.

I have a problem.

Helping pack the bags:


I take too many pictures. Lots and lots of pictures. Today Lowan is 4 weeks old and so far this month, I have taken 272 pictures at least. I already deleted some that were no good and there are some in different folders that are not in that count. WOW!! I have a photo problem.


On the train with Daddy.

Now, this is not really a bad thing. And it is really why I LOVE digital so much. I can take all these pictures and it doesn't matter. Just takes up a little (or a lot) disk space. I even have an external drive to move the pictures when they become too many on the computer.


With Grandma.

So this past weekend we took the train to Sacramento to see Kyle's mom. We had a really good time. The train was so enjoyable, it was nice to not have to drive. We were busy and went to Ikea on Friday, Bodies Revealed on Saturday, and got Kintoki on Sunday (shaved ice with sweet red beans and ice cream... Delish!!).



Hanging out on the couch with Mommy.

Our New Toy

No, it's not the baby. But the Shasta Travel Trailer we just bought.

We're both really excited. I promised more camping trips to Kyle if we got a trailer. I'm not the biggest fan of sleeping on the ground and this will be much more comfortable. I also would say I am pretty apprehensive about camping with a baby, so this solves all our problems.



Here is the outside.


And this is inside towards the front. Full stove and oven, sink that can either work off of a water tank (that currently leaks) or a hose can be attached from the outside. Drawers and shelves.



This is towards the back. There are couches like this on both sides and they pull out towards the middle and make one big bed. Then along the top, hammocks can be hung. They will sleep another two (small) people. Neither Kyle or I will ever sleep up there, but Lowan can when he gets older. For now, he'll just sleep with us. The table is laying on the floor, it can either be set up for use indoors between the couches (about like it is laying) or outside off the side of the trailer.



Lowan is doing really well. He is eating and sleeping much of the time. But the really exciting stuff is his alert, awake times. He smiled at me on Saturday in response to me talking to him. It felt different then his smiles when he is sleeping or just content. I don't know though, it may still be too early for a "real" smile. But it sure felt real.



He is such a joy and makes me very happy. I think we are taking the train to Sacramento to see Kyle's mom this weekend. This also seems like a lot of fun.



Lowan had a busy week last week with my sister in town. We went to the park for the first time. We went to the river to meet with Kyle while he was gold panning. Then this weekend, Kyle and I went to an Earth Day event with Lowan at Intermountain Nursery. Lowan gets around for a little 3 week old.

Birth

Here is my birth story.



I went into labor on Sunday night right about 11pm and then we left for the hospital near 1am. My main moment of grumpiness through the whole labor occurred right at 11 when Kyle asked what was wrong. I guess I still expected the contractions to go away, but he says he could instantly tell things were different. We got admitted right away and Lowan was born at 7:15am Monday, March, 31st. He was a very healthy 8 pounds and 21 inches long.

When I was admitted, they check my dilation and I was 3.5 cm. The contractions were about 3 to 3 1/2 minutes apart. This was at about 2am I guess. I had gotten sick at home and thrown up a few times before getting to the hospital (I knew when I ate pizza for dinner earlier that evening it was a bad idea). Labor went surprisingly fast because the next time they checked me at about 4 or 4:30 am, I was 8 to 9 cm. WOW, we were all shocked. I was expecting to be about 4 to 6 at the most. My water broke (and there was no mistaking it this time!!) and my whole body was convulsing or contracting during the contractions. This happened about 6 to 10 times, were pretty sure that was my transition period.



The nurse came back in and checked me again, this must have been about 5am. She did not say anything, but went to the nurse call button and called for my midwife to come right away. At this point it crossed my mind that I may be fully dilated, but they weren't telling me. However, I had a lot of other things on my mind, or really only one all encompassing thing on my mind.

So I was ready to begin pushing, but had to wait. Kyle was phenomenal, he kept me focused and breathing through everything. I couldn't have done this without his help and focus, it was amazing. For someone who thought they did not want to be in the labor room with me when we first found out I was pregnant, he did so well, he could almost be a doula (ha-ha). He would not think so, and I'm sure it was our connection that made it possible for us to link and work through the contractions so well. He had me doing the funny breathing to keep me from pushing, which was very hard. The urge to push was very strong and hard to control.



Finally the midwife arrived and told me I could start pushing. I was kind of in shock, I did not think it would happen so fast. Then the nurse confirmed that I had been ready for the past half hour while we waited for the midwife. The delivery was a little hard, mostly because Lowan was face up, or sunny-side-up, as my midwife said. So it took one and three quarter hours of pushing for our little guy to make his appearance. I definitely had some moments of utter exhaustion and feared being able to keep pushing. It's funny, I did not really pay any attention to the clock during labor, but during pushing, I kept looking at the time. I kept thinking I should be done by now, why is this taking so long. We did not know Lowan was face up. My mom was able to see everything she wanted to see (she was helping hold a leg for me) and Kyle was able to avoid seeing everything he did not want to see. He stayed behind me and for every single push, he counted for me. It was the only thing I focused on during the push and was also the most helpful. He said afterwards, he did not know if it was good or bad, but just kept doing it. I am happy he did, because I may not have told him to keep going had he stopped. The pressure got really great as Lowan's head was very near and finally, out he came. In one push, his head and then body. It was pretty amazing and I'd say the pain was not near as bad as it could have been. I think I've suffered more with the aches and pains of recovery more than the labor and delivery.

They put him up on my chest and began wiping him clean. He was the most beautiful baby I'd ever seen and I swelled with love. So did Kyle!



I was able to follow my birthing plan and did not have any unnecessary medical interventions, so I was really excited. My sister is describing Lowan as organic, which both Kyle and I think is very cute and appropriate for us!

Things got a little scary for us right after Lowan arrived because his color was off and he was grunting. They said he was in respiratory distress and took him over to the baby table to put him on oxygen. Kyle stayed with him as much as possible, even going with him into the nursery when they still couldn't get his breathing under control. I was really stressed out, but the nursing staff was very helpful and kept informing us that this transition phase can happen this way and he seemed fine otherwise, this was being done as a precaution. The pediatrician ordered a couple of chest x-rays which showed a partial collapsed lung, but was greatly improved by the second x-ray. We got to go into the nursery around 9:30 when I was being moved from Labor & Delivery to Postpartum for a few minutes. He was looking really good and the nurse said as soon as they got the lab results back and if things looked good (which they expected they would) we would be getting him very soon. I was getting really anxious and wanted to have him in my arms. This whole part of my experience is very hazy, I don't know all the details because I think I was pretty out of it after the birth. Kyle probably knows better what exactly happened, but I just care that he is great now.



After another couple of hours, he was brought to us in Postpartum, healthy and fantastic. They said he was doing much better and seemed to have no problems. We were very relieved. It was a very long four hours for me and I don't want him away from me for a minute now. Well, unless he's sleeping safely in his crib while I get my zzz's in my bed.

So we got home on Tuesday at about 2pm and Kyle's helped keep me fed and reminded me to take naps or at least lay down and rest as much as possible. He has been the biggest help and was the most amazing labor partner I could have ever hoped for.



I don't think I could have had this baby without Kyle's presence, I'm glad he decided he could be with me in the delivery room!

40 Weeks.

I have lots to say, but don't really have the desire to sit and say it yet. My need to get things back in order around the house, nap when the baby is napping, and love and cuddle Lowan when he isn't are much stronger than my desire to blog at the moment.

And then things are going to get even more crazy. My grandma and aunt are arriving tomorrow, my uncle and his wife are arriving Saturday, and my sister and her whole brood are getting here Sunday.

So... it will be awhile. But I finished putting together my belly progression sequence.

(It is not working right now... will try to get the photo up soon. Instead here is Lowan)



I got really big at the end, and now... not so big. It is really weird and surreal to no longer be pregnant and to have Lowan here with us. He is a great baby that has made me the happiest mom in the world!!

Lowan's Here

The baby is here. And he is fantastic. I am just going to post a few pics of our little man Lowan Thomas. He was born Monday morning at 7:15am. 8 pounds, 21 inches.

Home from the hospital.

EDITED TO ADD: You know you aren't in labor when you look as happy I we do in these pictures taken from my day in the hospital. In the morning on Friday, when the nurse checked on me, Kyle said "She's still smiling". He thought this was a good thing. The nurse however did not, she said it meant things weren't progressing and I was not really in labor. Which we already knew, but it was funny and I wanted to share the pics. I know I did not look like this when I was REALLY having contractions!

But no birth!

So it's been a long day and a half, but we are back home and Lowan has not been born yet. I thought my water broke yesterday morning and Kyle and I headed to the hospital at about 10:30 for a labor check.

Apparently I was not the only one confused about whether or not my water broke, as the hospital staff went back and forth yesterday if it had or not. The test was negative, but they thought it had as well. I just did not have the gush that some people have mentioned I could have expected. So they did an ultrasound to measure how much amniotic fluid was inside, it had gone from a measure of 16 a month a go to 7 yesterday. So at that point they figured even with negative tests, it must have broken. So I was admitted and they planned to induce with pitocin to speed things along because of the risk of infection after the bag of waters breaks.



I was moved to a labor and delivery room and began discussing options with the nurse and decided I'd like to wait on the pitocin to see if things started moving along on their own. My contractions, while weak, had progressed from 10 minutes apart when we arrived, to about 5-6 minutes apart once I was admitted (3 hours later). My midwife said that was fine and to re-evaluate me at 6pm and if no progress had been made, then to start induction. She went off call and the Dr. at my office was on call.



We discussed the difference of completing the break in my bag of waters versus taking pitocin with the nurse and so she called the Dr. to see what he wanted to do. At that point he said he was not sure my water had broken because that amount of change in amniotic fluid can happen. He said he thought we should do nothing all night and see if I made any progress over the next 12 hours and if I was not leaking and there were no changes, I could potentially go home. It would be between me and the midwife at that point.



She called in to check on me at 6am and still wanted to induce even though it still appeared that my water had not broken and my labor had slowed down quite a bit, I was only contracting once every 15 to 30 minutes and they were still very mild. Kyle and I talked about it and wanted to see if there was a more definitive way of finding out if my water had broken before we decided to proceed with induction. We really wanted to have as natural of a birth as possible. So once my midwife arrived, she did a different test and we had another ultrasound to check my amniotic fluid levels. At this point the new test still did not show amniotic fluid and the ultrasound showed the measurement up to 11 now. I guess these fluctuations are pretty normal.

So after a really long night of very little sleep and a lot of discomfort and no food (for me at least) we got released this morning at about 10:30. The first thing we did was go out to breakfast, I was starving. I think this is the first time I've gone 24 hours without eating solid food. Jello just doesn't cut it for very long!! Then we came home and took a nap.

I'm still having mild contractions that are pretty irregular and am at a solid 3 centimeters dilated, but still just 70% effaced. At this point, I'm happy to be home to let my labor progress on its own schedule to see if this baby wants to arrive in his own time. I still have a little less than a week until my due date and then another week until my midwife feels induction is necessary. So, while I would have liked to come home with a baby in my arms instead of still inside of me, I also feel very strongly about trying to have him in as natural a way as possible. I feel like my body just wasn't ready and while induction would have brought him along, I believe in the natural process of childbirth and would like to try my hardest to have the ideal birthing experience I can. After all, this may be the only child we have.

I've had pretty strong feelings about how I'd like to labor but they have kind of been made worse by my very recent watching of the movie The Business of Being Born which I'm pretty sure I first heard about over at Amy's blog. It was a really good movie (kind of distressing for a women who is 39 weeks pregnant) about the decline in the quality of natural childbirth in hospitals. So I really did not want to fall prey to the insistence of nurses and doctors that I had to be induced when it was not medically necessary. That was the thing my birthing class coach kept saying, just keep asking "Why is this medically necessary?" if you are uncomfortable with anything they want to do.

And the other experience that I kept having was they give you options that really sound like something you have to do. Like when they said, "we are starting pitocin because you need it" it doesn't really feel like I have a choice. But we got a fantastic nurse who made sure to talk to us a little more about benefits and negatives with choices instead of insisting what we needed to do.

So I'm still trying to keep an open mind because I don't want to me so rigid that I'm upset if things don't go the way I plan. I can't control everything, but I'm glad I controlled this situation the best I could.

So here's to laboring on my own!!

Getting Closer.

I had another appointment today and am now almost 3 centimeters dilated. My midwife did not mention effacement, so I am assuming I am at or near 100%. She was willing to bet I would not make it another week, but she was pretty confident last week also. I am having contractions right now, but they are weak and inconsistent which has been pretty standard over the last week. I mostly feel crampy, I don't know how that translates into actual labor. So it's just a waiting game right now and we'll see.

Not Yet.

We're still waiting. Things have been busy. I felt sick most of Thursday, all day yesterday and off and on today. I feel faint a lot of the time. I have barely there contractions all the time. But nothing real so far. No real labor to speak of. It's not so bad because I keep telling myself I'll be 4 centimeters and 100% effaced at my appointment on Wed. and then labor can really kick in. I'm just getting the beginning work done with ease before the hard labor begins.

So I'll post again soon, maybe after the baby arrives or maybe before. We'll see how I feel.

Not long now.

I had a Dr. Appt yesterday and am currently 2cm dilated and 70% effaced. I had quite a few contractions and even thought they were moving along rather nicely. They went from painless to mild discomfort. They even seemed to be getting closer but not very regular. The contractions eased up as I relaxed a little more and went back to painless and sporadic. I felt a little flu-ish this morning, which is also a good sign of progression.

My midwife is pretty optimistic as well. She said I needed to make my next appointment (for next Wed) but might not make it till then and maybe she'd see me this weekend to have a baby. I'm excited, but don't want to get too hopeful. After all it is possible that I stay this way for awhile.

So who knows, maybe a baby will be here within the next few days.

Big Ol' Belly

Here I am at 37 weeks. I am getting more and more uncomfortable. I can no longer lay on my left side because it hurts all the time. My back hurts less, but my front hurts more. I have been getting more stretch marks, even a few on my lower back... what is that all about? But I am so close I can't even believe it!!



I had a Dr. appt today and it was uneventful as usual. She was really good about answering all the questions I had after taking a marathon birthing class over this past weekend. The thing she stressed the most... don't be a control freak about birthing. She told me to not go to the hospital with a long list of things I don't want done or don't want to happen, just in case they do. It's good advice, about the same thing Tara told me. Go with the flow! So that is what I am trying to do.

I've been trying not to complain too much, but Tara is getting sick of me. She said every time she calls me I am in a grumpy mood and groaning a lot. I still feel pretty good for the most part and will definitely miss being pregnant once the baby comes. But I am so excited for the little guy!

Still no crafting, but I've been slowly working at getting the baby's room ready. It is so close. I just need to get the dresser/changing table thing from my parents house and into my house. It is some old piece of furniture that is kind of like a cabinet, but it will be our dresser changing table.

Maybe soon I'll have something crafty to post.

Can you feel the love??

I sure can.

Everyone has been nothing short of extremely generous!! I can't believe how lucky we have been with this pregnancy. RheLynn sent me the cutest baby gift... a stuffed horse and rabbit plus two little blanket/burp cloths.



So cute, the little stuffed animals are so sweet and I can't wait until the baby shows an interest.



Then there has been the unbelievable amount of things people have been so generous to hand down to us. I finally spent a little time sorting by size. This laundry basket is full (OVERFLOWING!!) of everything that has been given to us from others that is sized up to 3 months. I don't think our little man will have to wear the same thing twice. I only hope there is someone I can pass it onto when he outgrows everything. There is so much cute stuff.



And here are the few new pieces. I am so happy to be clothing our baby in nearly all hand me downs. I think these clothes are not worn long enough before little ones outgrow them. And it makes me happy to be avoiding the unnecessary purchases when there is already so much out there.



I did feel the need to buy one outfit (I think it is the only item of clothing I've personally bought so far) that the baby will come home in from the hospital. I thought he should have his own new special bought by Mommy outfit. It is the stripped jumper. So cute!!

Good Food

A little while ago Tara posted about comfort foods. Something she felt inspired to do by Amy over at My Merry Way. I felt compelled to do the same but never felt up to it.

Until now...

I am kind of weird about food. I think I may have even talked of this before. If I really like something the first time I have it, that is the way I think it should always be. Then I don't really like too many alterations. There are foods made be specific people in my life and I don't want the recipe repeated by anyone else.

My mom make lasagna that can't be beat. I try all the time, it is never the same. Part of the special- ness of her lasagna is the sauce. It doesn't really happen anymore, but when all three of us kids were living at home and older (like high school age) she would make sauce and each family member would wander through the kitchen and taste the sauce. Everyone had an opinion and added more of something to the pot. More oregano, more basil, more garlic (usually my vote), maybe some hot sauce, or a little salt. After the sauce had simmered for awhile, the entire family had been involved, usually more than once. This is probably why my mom doesn't have a recipe to give, and I can't recreate the sauce. I also loved to eat the shredded cheese that lay on the cutting board waiting for the layering. But this drove my mom crazy... because as anyone who has grated mozzarella knows, it is not the easiest, being a soft cheese. So I try to avoid pissing off the chef and would take slices and then dip them in the hot sauce bubbling away on the stove. I even had a friend who liked to make lasagna sandwiches, which are so good also. She was big on pasta sandwiches (spaghetti, lasagna, penne, whatever she had between two slices of garlic bread). So I often describe this as my favorite food.



But while living in Alaska... something new. Something GREAT. Something really so basic and not so special but that I love so much, I make Tara make it for me (I could do this one myself, but for some reason, it needs to be done by Tara) every time I'm up there. Cornflake Chicken. She found the recipe in a Weight Watchers cookbook. I don't think we use any of the low fat items it calls for and we use all the full fat versions (like mayonnaise). It is such a basic recipe, but I love the juicy chicken and the crunchy cornflakes. She usually makes a tasty veggie to go with. And it is a recipe that her whole family enjoys. Which can be particularly hard with her picky husband and step-son.

I am getting hungry!! Oh, so is my dog, here she comes to try to get me to feed her. Well, I've probably bored enough with only two of my favorite dishes. What of Moner's macaroni and cheese, or Kyle's fried rice, or dessert, or breakfast. Alright, off to eat something.

For being a food lover, I have to say, I had a hard time spelling a lot food words. Spell check left me with big yellow slashes all over this post.

(Above is a picture completely unrelated to food. Kokanee LOVES to sit on our lap. So much so that getting on the floor for any reason usually entails her right up in our faces. Here she is getting brushed by Kyle and loving the attention.)